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Edition Twenty-Three

Is Settling for Second Best Ever an Option?


Are better-than-nothing relationships really better than nothing? I don’t believe so, and deep down, you don’t either! If you are in a relationship with someone you like an awful lot but don’t truly love, and who doesn’t really love you the way you want and need to be loved, then it may be time to honor those feelings and move on. Staying in a dead-end relationship will only prolong your reunion with your true partner. Selling out, I’m afraid, is never the answer. It will only destroy your chances of connecting with your beloved.

Stay true to your wish of finding a loving soulmate with whom you can be happy and fulfilled. I know that being on your own can be lonely. However, committing to someone whom (if you are honest) you know is not “the One” can be a difficult path to follow, as well as a huge barrier to finding your true soulmate—that person with whom you made an agreement, a long time ago, to reunite here on planet Earth when you are both ready for the relationship. If you continue to put your dreams on hold and settle for second best, your reunion with Mr. or Ms. Right will not take place.

Don’t keep your true soulmate waiting too long. He or she is looking for you and will not wait for you forever, so get your act together. Although connecting with your spiritual partner is a matter of destiny, you must remember we have been given free will; we have the freedom to choose a different path. If you do choose to settle, your soulmate will have no choice but to do the same, in which case you will both miss out (at least for this lifetime) on a very special connection that could have been yours to enjoy for the rest of your lives. That would truly be a shame!

Staying in a better-than-nothing relationship is not fair to the person you’re with, either. You can both be adults about the situation by talking about it and agreeing to move on. Maybe in time, you can remain friends.

If you want to stop unhealthy patterns from occurring in your relationships, you have to be aware of them and stop them as soon as they arise. If you don’t, you will continue to attract the same kinds of relationships over and over. It won’t be easy; old patterns are extremely hard to break. But you can do it! You will need to be strong and determined. Learn some relationship skills and look for the warning signs early in a relationship. They are always there to help you, if you don’t blind yourself to them. If you don’t have the strength to leave a relationship that you know in your heart is not what you truly want, then you are not yet ready to draw your compatible soulmate to you, and that’s okay! This just means you have some more growing and developing to do.

Only when you truly love yourself enough and know in your heart that you are wonderful and loving and that you deserve to have a great partner—that’s when you will draw in your true and highest soulmate. Before I end this article I would like to say that if you are already married, please do not use the soulmate concept to end the marriage. Honour your commitment to this person (unless, of course, there is abuse in the marriage) and know that having settled for second best does not mean you are sentenced to a life of misery. So don’t be too hard on yourself or your partner. With hard work, determination, and willingness from both partners, these relationships can be happy and fulfilling.

By Joanne B. Parrotta